The image on the screen was grainy, but you could see his little body kicking around. He convulsed a few times and then stopped completely. Hot tears poured down my cheeks as I prayed. "Not again. Not again, God. Why would You do this to me?! Please, no. Please..." I prayed harder than I thought possible.
I was a little surprised, because I just figured that whatever she ordered or bought for me would be waiting at home. But hey, presents? Alright! "Well, yeah! Gimme gimme gimme...." She had me close my eyes and hold out my hands. (Universal language for, "I didn't wrap it.") which I obediently did. I could feel an envelope with something in it, but couldn't tell what it was. So, I opened my eyes and she told me to open it. When I opened the envelope, there was a card inside with a newborn baby's hand on the cover...cue the butterflies. I opened the card and my world was rocked. There was a digital pregnancy test telling me she was "PREGNANT".
I follow a group of dad bloggers on Twitter. We all get together and talk about what it means to be a 'Modern Daddy'. Don't get me wrong, I love my dad, but he had it SO easy! He came from the era of "Men don't do housework." Lucky bastard. But, I digress. Usually there is a #DadsTalking topic put up for discussion ahead of time, but this time there was no topic so it was a free for all. One gent (@Genuine) asked about competition and our kids and if it was a good or bad thing. It sparked a lively (and rather civil) debate on the pros and cons of competition. I was sad that I got in late and couldn't join the fray. SO, here's my two cents worth on the matter.
First, what is Male Pattern Dadness? (MPD) MPD afflicts a majority of dads. The sad part is that most dads don't even know they have it until it's too late; Johnny gets in with the wrong crowd, or Suzy becomes a stripper. The key is to detect the warning signs early. Then, do something about them. The indications of MPD are: